Bianca the Bug

Not Enough Hours....

2009-04-21T00:00:00.005-04:00

There aren't enough hours in the day. As a new mom, that saying has special relevance. Boy, do I wish 'having it all' translated to 'having enough time for all of it'. When I get home, I try to devote much of my "free" time engaging Tinka. I understand that many moms struggle to strike the seemingly elusive work/life balance. So, if you'd like to know just how much time you're devoting to work, cooking, traveling, and most importantly your little one, try CNN's Busy Mom Time Calculator! How do you stack up to the average mom?

Hello, my name is...

2009-04-06T00:00:00.006-04:00

Who knew it would come to this? A significant portion of my life I devoted to carving out my very own niche. My hats have been plenty from academic scholar to engineer to businesswoman to wife and most recently to Tinka’s Mom (TM). Wow! Never imagined that those countless nights studying would lead to such a heaving-hitting moniker. Forget about the MS, MBA or PE designations that follow my last name. They carry no weight like my latest and greatest two-letter designator, which trumps all others and has catapulted me in to the awesome social circle of Mommyhood.

Most of her pre-school aged friends refer to me as Tinka’s Mom. Honestly, I don’t blame them. It’s far easier to remember one name versus two or three, right? So, my hubby and I have been marginalized, forever known in pre-school social circles as drum roll please…..Tinka’s Mom and Dad. To seal the deal, the parents of her friends also refer to us as TM and TD. We can’t (and don’t) complain. Who better to be associated with than our very own princess!

The impact our little one has had on our social life has been welcomed and delightful. Bye-bye are the events of “Ladies Night”, hello to the wonderful world of “Mommy and Me” playdates. It’s been a complete joy swapping stories and sharing laughs on nursing, toddler hair care, meltdowns, sleeping (an elusive past-time). So, to Tinka I say “tank youuuuu!” (yes, without the ‘h’)

Signing off,

Ms. XXX, TM

T (as in tantrum) Time

2009-03-30T00:00:00.014-04:00

I was advised that it would be nine months before any hint of behavior remotely associated with the terrible twos would show their face. Leave it to this rookie-mom to believe that life with baby actually adheres to a schedule.

One happy Saturday afternoon, I notice a strange phenomenon coming from downstairs. The sound erupts without notice and commands my full and undivided attention much like a leaky diaper threatening to ruin baby and mommy’s Sunday’s best.

I jet down stairs only to see that we’d been victimized by none other than-- Dun...dun...dun...duunnn! –THE TANTRUM MONSTER. A stream of questions instantly flood my mind: How did he gain entry? Who let him in? Did I leave the door unlocked? Why meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee?

After my rare yet brief pity-party subsides, I notice Tinka --his latest victim--on the floor, legs kicking and arms flailing in an apparent meltdown.Daddy calmly explains that she has these “experiences” from time to time and that he’s concerned that she may injure herself. Apparently, there was something that she desired that wasn’t granted or within reach and as the story goes,....THE TANTRUM MONSTER took hold of my firstborn, overwhelming her to the point that she could no longer remain upright.

Almost immediately, my problem-solving skills kick in. How can she learn to ward him off better, I wonder. I was advised (once again) to show empathy. You know--by expressing that I understand how she feels or that I am sorry she’s experiencing such grief. This strategy hasn’t been the most effective weapon against THE TANTRUM MONSTER but, nonetheless, it does help Tinka’s Mom (that would be me) remain level-headed.

Check out this latest video of THE TANTRUM MONSTER striking yet another one of our precious darlings….. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KpSfThUv_pc

Baby Talks about Her New Life

2009-03-27T15:13:00.002-04:00

Time flies when you’re having fun. Since my last post, I’ve relocated to the Midwest, mastered the art of walking (forward and backward), celebrated my first birthday, and met a great group of toddlers. Life is g-o-o-d! Did I mention that I have a grand total of 7 and a 1/2 teeth now?

Mommy encourages me to practice good oral hygiene but I find it way more exciting assisting her with maintaining her pearly whites. Springtime has been filled with playdates at the library, stroller rides around campus and sunny days at the park.

For some odd reason, Mommy decorates my hair with these little twisty things and other things that clamp on. I’m not certain what her thinking is but Daddy and I prefer the ‘natural’ look. For one, it’s ultra-low maintenance and we both think I resemble Daddy when my hair is tightly curled. A few weeks ago, she looked really disappointed that I’d removed all but one of the little twisty things, which she worked so hard on that morning. When she arrived to pick me up from school, I know it must’ve appeared that I’d been attacked by a pack of puppies. No! I simply reached back, removing, one-by-one, anything attached to my hair that didn’t originate from my scalp. Had I thought of switching hands, I would’ve managed to remove the remaining one. I’ve only noticed one of my toddler friends with these things in her hair. But, none of the others have them. Interesting! Then again, she and I are the only two who wear dresses and colorful tights. I wonder what that’s about?

Girls Like Math!

2008-08-05T00:01:00.005-04:00

Girls Like Math. Yes they do! What a great brand concept! Dr. Ina Patton, an accomplished Forensic Psychologist, stumbled on a great branding opportunity through her love of painting. I am thrilled that a mom has sought to dismiss the many myths around what our daughters enjoy and find interesting. Of all subjects, math was my absolute favorite. I especially loved solving word problems and conducting science experiments. The thrill of coming up with the “right” answer kept my passion for numbers alive.

Girls Like Math currently has a line of children’s and women’s tops that cover fields including math, politics, computer science and science. Dr. Patton intends to extend the Girls Like Math brand through product categories including literature, academic supplies and games. Price points are reasonable starting at $30. I wouldn’t be surprised to see the Girls Like Math brand distributed in popular retail channel, Target.

What a great message to send to our little mathematicians, politicians, computer scientists and entrepreneurs. Please check out Dr. Patton’s adorable clothing line at http://www.girlslikemath.com/.

This book belongs to....

2008-08-04T00:01:00.001-04:00

So, this weekend’s storytelling was on bugs. Creepy, I know. None of the young princesses who attended last weekend’s “Fancy Nancy” soiree returned this Saturday. Wonder why? The creepy crawly theme failed to keep Tinka’s attention. But, the event wasn’t a complete waste.

In my discussion of “Fancy Nancy” last week, I expressed my desire to see better ethnic diversity and representation in children literature and film. I guess the saying is true: You have not because you ask not! Thank God I asked because to my pleasant surprise, I discovered an interesting read. The book, featuring two young African American boys on its cover, was “You Can Do It!” by Tony Dungy. What a great find! I loved the illustration and theme. Linden, the main character and Tony’s younger brother, has issues finding his “it”. You know, his ”it”. All of his siblings seem to know what their hearts passions are except him. His dad gives him wise advice regarding the role of prayer in determining what his “it” (read:his desired career) will be. Linden especially enjoys making others smile and learned that dentist do as well. He is actually a dentist today. This book is recommended for readers 4 and up. This is definitely a great read with a great message.

Football, Anyone?

2008-08-01T00:01:00.010-04:00

Keke Palmer is a budding actress with several popular titles to her credit--most notably was her leading role in “Akeelah and the Bee”. Now she’s returned with another breakout role in “Longshot”, co-starring Rapper/Director/Actor Ice Cube. The based-on-a-true-story film shares the struggles of an adolescent who pushes the envelope of who can play football. Five years ago, 11-year-old girl Jasmine Plummer made history as the first female to assume the position of quarterback in the national Pop Warner football tournament. Personally, I admit to not being aware of Miss Plummer’s story. But, I am glad that there are still young people challenging the status quo.

I enjoy football! Hail to the Redskins, Hail Victoryyyyyyy…. Fear the Turtlllllle!!! and even admit to tossing the ball around a time or two. Did I mention that throwing the ball requires a significant amount of accuracy and concentration?

This film has me excited for a number of reasons. It juxtaposes the seemingly unrelated topics—girls and football. Many aren’t aware that women actually have their own football league—Independent Women’s Football League. Hail to the DC Divas. Hail Victorrrrrrry. To learn more about the IWFL, visit http://www.iwflsports.com/ .

I hope this film instills an important lesson to its young audience—never allow others to define your dream! In the meantime, let’s get ready for football.

To view the movie trailer, click http://themovingpicture.net/new-trailer-for-the-longshots

Baby Talks About Mommy's MBAs

2008-07-31T00:01:00.008-04:00

Mommy received her second MBA, which stands for Mommy’s Beautiful Angel, late last year. What an honor that she considers me the more valuable of the two. Though her capital investment in me, think college tuition, new car, wedding, first house deposit, business startup, did I miss anything? far exceeds that of her other MBA, the ROI--that’s return on investment. I’m also quite literate in business jargon--she stands to gain--think grandchildren, grandchildren, did I mention grandchildren?-- is unquantifiable.

I am also more engaging than her diploma. Her diploma doesn’t giggle when she sings the “Eensy Wensy Spider” or the “ABC” song. Nor does it pull her hair to convey how much she was missed during the day. It never knocks over her morning drink just before she heads out the door in an attempt to spend just five more minutes together.

Mommy’s other MBA has afforded her an affinity of career options and a great network of friends (Aunties T, Bonnie, Denyse and Michelle and Uncle Bill). And, I guess, it will make possible the many great things that a baby dreams. read: exceptional daycare, Mandarin lessons, trips to grandma’s.

Gotta crawl, carrot and oatmeal time! My high chair’s calling! Anybody seen my bib?

A Recipe for Success

2008-07-30T00:01:00.007-04:00

My sister recently shared a recipe for preparing organic baby food. It’s really quite simple! Thus far, Tinka has enjoyed home-made pears and carrots which I must say have been um-um good (Tinka concurs).

To start, plop the desired fruit (let’s start with 4 pears) or veggie into a huge pot of water set to boil. After periodically checking for mushiness by poking with a knife tip, they’re done! Do replenish the water supply ensuring that the pears are 75% covered by water. This process takes roughly 75 minutes. Boy, that’s a long time, I know. Next, cool the pears under cold running water and begin to peel. Easier said than done. Be sure to avoid cutting the “meat” as you’ll wind up with too little fruit to serve. Next, slice pear in to small chunks. Be advised, the finer your cuts, the less work your blender has to do. Remove all seeds and stem. Finally, scoop diced pears in to blender and select grind. You may also consider selecting a setting that creates a finer sauce. BE SURE TO CHECK SAUCE FOR CHUNKS!

I use the containers from the store-bought organic baby food. After transferring the pear sauce to the itty-bitty containers, I normally store the containers in the freezer. Defrost in your refrigerator for an hour and serve. Tinka, amazingly, prefers her veggies mixed with oatmeal cereal. Must’ve gotten her love for veggies from Daddy.

Originally, I tried several brands of organic baby food to my dismay. I discovered that a single organic pear costs around $.90 and can produce two small servings versus a single store bought jar costing the same amount. Though the home-made sauce has a much shorter shelf life (Tinka usually eats hers the same day that they’re defrosted), it tastes better and I assume has far less preservatives. Happy dining. Bon Appetit!

Baby Talks About Malia Obama

2008-07-29T00:01:00.016-04:00

Hello virtual world! Waving sorta. I’m Tinka, the world’s youngest blogger. You’ve heard my mommy share her perspective. Big word for an infant, I know. Trust me, my vocabulary is growing exponentially. Please allow me to issue a disclaimer: my day is very compact with naps, tummy time, diaper changes and feedings. So, pardon me if my posts aren’t as long as Mommy’s. Tank you. Yes, I intended to write thank you that way.

Pababababa. I am beyond excited about my first entry. So, without further adieu. “Girl Power” is alive and well thanks to 10-year-old Malia Obama, daughter of the Democratic Party Presidential Nominee Barak Obama. My mommy shared the video of her recent family interview. When I become a tween, I’d love to possess the confidence and maturity that she does. What impressed me the most about Malia was her willingness to share her convictions on topics that matter most to her (i.e. how her dad should greet kids, what it means to see her mommy Michelle featured in a popular magazine.)

Not to be outdone, my mommy also appeared in a popular magazine, Glamour, several years ago featuring Wharton women. She's not just a pretty face. She's a pretty face with an MBA (Mommy's Beautiful Angel). When she recently shared the results of her beautiful makeover, I was so proud of her accomplishment that I instantly gave the article my sign of approval— a nice wet kiss.

Though I completely understand Mr. Obama’s desire to limit the amount and kind of exposure that his daughters receive, I certainly wish I’d get to hear more from them. While it’s great to hear the perspective of adults, I find the perspective of my peers to be as intriguing and valuable. My saucer is calling, “gotta crawl”!

Isn't She a Doll!

2008-07-28T00:01:00.008-04:00

My recent trip to BN really caused a stir and thus, has inspired a number of my upcoming posts.

In addition to my formal introduction to “Fancy Nancy” (in my best British accent, nose pointing upward), there were two little princesses that remained on my mind long after the storytelling ended. The first one that I noticed was around six years of age and had beautiful olive skin. I can’t say for certain what her ethnicity was but I am almost positive that she wasn’t of African American, Caucasion, or Hispanic descent. OK, so what was so special about her? I’m getting to that. She held a beautiful chocolate baby doll in her arms. Wow, I thought. Perhaps she picked up someone else’s doll by mistake.

But, upon closer examination, she and her doll wore matching dresses. I, immediately, scanned the room for her parents, to see if my hypotheses on her ethnicity was correct. Though I was correct, I was a bit perplexed. I certainly don’t credit myself with knowing what motivated the selection of this doll of a darker hue but I’m sure this adorable girl picked and pointed to the doll and outfit she preferred best. It was probably as simple as that. What conclusions can we draw from this doll selection? Unsure. Does the selection have any roots in self-hate? Doubt it. Is this princess suffering from low self-esteem? Probably not.

This brings me to the next princess I noticed carrying a doll. She was a gorgeous chocolate complexion and was attending with an older woman possibly her grandmother. Her doll was Caucasion. Now what was I to make of this? I was forced to use the logic as I did with the princess with the chocolate doll. Perhaps, the gorgeous brown girl merely chose the doll she preferred. Today, kids have a lot of say in purchases.

But, I was instantly reminded of the social experiment conducted over fifty years by psychologist Kenneth Clark called the “doll test”. This experiment was used to help make the case for desegregation in the landmark case Brown v. Board of Education. Clark’s experiment included probing questions that exposed some disturbing complexities about race and self-esteem.

My singular yet random observation at a book store yields only a few “hopeful” hypotheses. So, I must give both little princesses credit for choosing the doll that they preferred and assume that their decisions stemmed from places of wholeness and innocence.

Fit For a Princess

2008-07-27T00:01:00.006-04:00

As I turned the corner, I was overwhelmed by a mix of bright pink and yellow party decorations streaming from shelf to shelf and the swarm of miniature “princesses” donning sparkly tiaras, oversized cosmetic jewelry and even elaborate princess costumes. Did I miss the memo? It's 2pm on Saturday, no one told me Barnes and Noble was hosting a girls-only birthday party. The crowd was abuzz, chatting anxiously until the guest of honor arrived. Who might that be you ask? “Fancy Nancy”. Again, you ask, Who might that be? She's the fictional character for whom a book series is based.

I consider myself to be “in the know” with all things girly. But, this, I admit, never once registered on my “girly girl” radar. Where have I been? How did I miss the book phenom that is known by an adjective describing her fashion sense and her first name? Thankfully, Tinka donned her pink and white striped outfit with matching pretty-in-pink shades or she would've really been underdressed. Anywho, I consider this my formal introduction into the land of “all things pretty”.

I was so taken aback by the festivities, I admit to not catching the storyline of the books that were read. However, I did learn that “Fancy Nancy's” creator is taking in a pretty penny from her huge following. Apparently, the tiaras, jewels and costumes are all a part of the “Fancy Nancy” brand which can be purchased at, none other than, destination affordable fashion, Tar-je' (That's Target for all my English speakers). In-te-res-ting.

I will reserve my opinion until I read several titles from the series. While I am all for “girl power”, I need to see better ethnic diversity and representation in children's literature, toys, programming, and movies. Anybody know where the Disney film “The Princess and the Frog” is in production? Until my next post, Au revoir!

This book belongs to....

2008-07-26T00:01:00.002-04:00

Just ask me how many books Tinka has in her personal library? Twenty and counting. (That's twice as many as mommy.) Regrettably, I was not an avid reader as a child or for much of my adult life. I, on the other hand, preferred to tackle a complicated math or physics problem instead. There was always something “more interesting” to do than to engage myself in literature. (What those things were escape me). In hindsight, I wish I’d embraced the wonderful world of books as a child. I am, admittedly, a self-described techie and number-cruncher. As an adult and new parent, there’s often the nagging desire to improve upon the life that your parents provided or the experiences that molded you into who’ve you become.

I began reading to Tinka when she was in the womb. Her favorite titles (read: my favorites) were “Peter’s Chair” and “What Does Baby Say?”. I am committed to reading to her regularly. My husband is an avid reader, with hundreds of titles to his collection. I believe that children often imitate their parents. So, I am also committed to reading for leisure. No pain, no gain, right?!

Selected Barnes and Nobles stores offer storytelling throughout the week for toddlers and children. We’ve attended several times and I have been quite impressed with how well the storyteller is able to engage her young audience. Tinka REALLY enjoyed (read: we both enjoyed) the two books read about time-telling. The storyteller did a lot of question and answer, which really got Tinka’s legs moving. Usually, a group activity, also sharing the book’s theme, accompanies the reading. We (read: I) made a clock out of paper plates, magazine clippings and straw piping.

Fortunately for us, most of her collection was received as gifts. As I am not an advocate of frivolous spending, especially in light of our not-so-great economic state, I strongly suggest borrowing your favorite titles from your public library especially before your little one begins teething or wants to put things in his mouth. (Always want to cut down on germs). Your local library will have plenty of good titles to choose from and at no cost to you. One word of advice, if you’re buying new books, I highly recommend the plastic versions, they hold up better against teething.

Each week, as part of my “This book belongs to” book series, I’ll share one of Tinka’s favorites. Stay tuned….. Happy Reading!

Peak-a-boo, I See You

2008-07-25T00:01:00.001-04:00

Wellness baby exams have become a regular part of my life. These checkups help mothers monitor the healthy growth and development of their infant. In my too-numerous-to-count Internet searches on infant health care, I came across a nifty program that all new moms should know about. Though most wellness baby exams are performed by pediatricians, The InfantSEE program, which was started in 2005, specifically promotes the healthy development of your little one’s eyes. Infants are eligible for a free eye assessment with an approved InfantSEE optometrist. Former President Jimmy Carter serves as its honorary spokesperson. According to the site, eye exams performed by pediatricians are less extensive than those conducted by optometrist. Therefore, parents are encouraged to schedule an infant eye exam as early as six months of age.

Tinka’s recent visit went very well. Her optometrist spent nearly an hour performing various tests on her baby browns. Our physician, a parent of two under three, was very skilled at maintaining Tinka’s attention while performing her assessment. She shared that many of today’s vision impairments can be prevented or mitigated with early detection. That was good to know!

Some other interesting statistics according to the website include:

10% of children are at risk from undiagnosed eye and vision problems
only 13% of mothers with children younger than 2 years of age have taken their infants to see an eye care professional for a well-care visit
Approximately 4 million children were born in 2004, according to the U.S. Census Bureau. In approximately 4%, strabismus will develop, and amblyopia will develop in 3% of the infants born each year who are at risk for serious eye and vision problems.

So if you suspect any issues (or if you don’t) with your little one's vision, I suggest you consider scheduling a visit. To learn more about the program and to check for an optometrist in your area, visit: http://www.infantsee.org/.

No Bite Bite!

2008-07-24T00:01:00.001-04:00

Just when I thought I’d mastered the art of breastfeeding, Tinka’s new pair of pearly whites emerge. Breastfeeding has definitely fostered the strong bond that we share. To be honest, we both have grown accustomed to her afternoon feedings and gain enjoyment from the experience-- she is nourished and comforted and I get quality time with her. While this milestone has brought so much joy, the celebration abruptly ended with the baring down of her adorable--yet sharp--pair of teeth, my screaming --“No bite bite Tinka!!”, and the flash of her adorable smile. Wow, who knew two little itty-bitty teeth could cause so much pain! Needless to say, my pain was short-lived when I saw those endearing eyes and that large smile. I’ve since learned to pay attention to the ‘clues’ that mark the end of a feeding. To begin with, usually when she initially removes her mouth that signals low milk supply and that she’s done. The benefits of breastmilk are countless: 1) the nutrients, 2) cost effectiveness, 3) mother-child bonding, 4) less frequent trips to the doctor (less days from work). My intention is to nurse up until her first birthday. I just hope I can hold up until then…..

Bianca's Born

2008-07-23T00:01:00.002-04:00

The start of 2008 has been like no other! Seven months ago my status changed from a boutique-shopping fashionista, once-a-week-salon-goer and regular-mani-pedi-enjoyer to a “professional” nursery song writer (I use this term very loosely having only three-songs to my credit), twice-a-day-milk-expresser and human burp cloth. Motherhood has definitely turned my life on its head. However, it’s been the most rewarding experience to date. And, to prove what a glutton for pain I am, my husband and I hope the stork will deliver our second bundle of joy next year. Yeah, I know, I know! I’ve heard the tales of raising ‘two under two.’ However, I must say that if our next child is anything like our first, who we’ve affectionately nicknamed Tinka, then our next can’t arrive soon enough.

I suspect the name for this blog raises a few eyebrows. If you must know, I labored over it for days, weeks, months (yeah, right?!). OK, I admit to spending all of 5 minutes coming up with it! If you’re a colleague or family member, you’d dispute the accuracy of that assertion and insist that minutes was a typo and instead I INTENDED to write seconds.

“Bianca the Bug” is my daughter’s best friend. Sing with me now…Bianca the bug, Bianca the buggggggg ,Bianca the buggggguggggg she’s my best friend. My husband came across this amazing find at a local retailer for $10 when our daughter was two months old. It’s a changing table attachment in the shape of a colorful bug with rotating wings. As the wings rotate, a nice melody plays. The patterned wings excited my daughter like no amount of swinging, cuddling or baby-talking ever could. “Bianca the bug” was an instant hit! The wings stimulated Tinka so much that she began to coo and quickly move her arms and limbs.

I absolutely LOVE the name Bianca, to the dismay of many of my loved ones. Thus, I was FORBIDDEN to use it. Thus, ‘Bianca the bug’ was born. Bianca is very-well traveled bug might I add. She’s already flown cross-country to the midwest and accompanies us on most road trips (attached to the car seat). The relationship between the two BFFs has recently reached an all-time low when Tinka began teething a month ago. Now that she’s able to reach for and remove the wings, Bianca often travelled with three out of four of her wings. To Bianca’s displeasure, Tinka also uses the wings to soothe her aching gums. Then again, what are friends for?..........